Refraining Co-Becomings: The Affective Pulse of Companionships

This article studies the affective pulsations of relating in the enduring and changing experiences of companionship. In particular, its interest lies in relational arrangements that form outside the categories of romantic and sexual couple relationships, beyond heteronormative and humanist understandings of families and relationships. The research is based on interview data on important experiences of sharing life with friends, animals, ex-partners, and other companions in Finland. I examine the experiences of companionship with a methodological approach of co-becoming, with which I stress the affective and dynamic nature of relating. I also examine the everyday unfolding of companionships through the lens of time. Being interested in the unique affective rhythms and pulsations of co-becomings that do not fit measurable scales of time, I evoke the understanding of time as duration. I do this by developing a Deleuzoguattarian concept of refrain as a lens through which I read the interview data. I show that approaching time as a non-linear duration and refrain allows me to follow the pulse of co-becomings in ways that grasp the minor and ambiguous affectivity of companionships. This article contributes to feminist research on intimacy, time, and temporality through its novel conceptual take on companionships as refraining co-becomings.